Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
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You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
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