Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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