Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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