Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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