I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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