Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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