dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
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