i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
third nipple confirmed
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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