Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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