How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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