Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
