I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
