do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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