think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Randomize
