So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize