Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
