So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
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