Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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