butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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