ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Randomize