Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Randomize
