I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
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