she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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