Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
