God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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