why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
