im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
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