That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
