I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I'm sobbing to NWA
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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