just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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