I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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