erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
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