So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
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and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
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I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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