yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
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