Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
