I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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