i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize