Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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