Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
sick fucks of a feather flock together
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
