He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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