I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
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