i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
