The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I feel like a drive thru vagina