There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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