She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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