so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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