So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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