thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
