no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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