Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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