I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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